Building resilience in children provides kids with a foundation of mental toughness so that they can rise when facing adversity and become successful adults.
-The Impactful Parent
Building Resilience in Children
“I give up. I can’t do it,” screams my son. He is frustrated with math homework. These words have become too familiar in our house, now that the kids are older. As toddlers, our children are naturally resilient in learning to walk. As young kids, our children are still resilient in learning how to swim. But somewhere between learning how to ride a bike and taking the ACT, our children begin to accept Giving-Up up as an option. How do we combat this mentality? Alex Yannacone, director of education and Community Programs Director from the University of Colorado, give us 7 Tools to build resilience in children. Click below if you want to watch the video of Alex explaining the 7 Tools to build resilience or you can read them below. Please note that I highly recommend you click the link and watch the video. Alex’s short 7-minute video has more details than what I have summarized below. Also, please go to The Impactful Parent Website (click here) and download a FREE printable worksheet to help you follow along with Alex’s presentation and help you discover your own strengths and weaknesses in your parenting for building resilience. Enjoy!
The 7 C’s to Build Resilience in Children
- Competence: The Ability to handle situations effectively.
- Allow your child to experience life, choices, consequences, and rewards on their own. Do not be a lawnmower parent. Allow your child to develop competence by highlighting what they do well, allowing them to acquire new skills and let mistakes happen.
- Confidence: The belief in one’s own ability.
- Focus on their fairness, integrity, persistence, and kindness. Praise honestly and specifically. Encourage challenging yet achievable goals.
- Connection: Developing community and support around us
- Allow your child to express all kinds of emotions without judgment.
- Show your child that relationships matter by addressing conflict directly and encourage them to develop their own close relationships with others.
- Character: To understand their own values and have a strong sense of self-worth.
- Talk about how behaviors affect other people
- Be a role model of good character
- Contribution: To give to others and gain a sense of purpose
- Teach the important value of servicing others
- Model generosity with time, energy, and resources
- Create opportunities for them to contribute
- Coping: The ability to overcome challenges
- Assist in understanding the difference between a real crisis and in the moment issues
- Model step by step problem solving
- Demonstrate self-care
- Control: Understanding choices and actions determines results
- Recognize small successes
- Discipline means to teach not to punish